Why? Oh I don't know, maybe because I get paid to do something I love (i.e. dance in a cage). Maybe because people all around me are treating me with kindness and respect and reverence. Maybe because I feel loved and admired and appreciated. Maybe because I have people who want to spend time with me. Maybe because almost every day now I get to come home from my temporary job and practice something I truly love...and to eventually perform the completed project in front of hundreds of people next month! Maybe because I have found a faith stronger than I have ever known in my life and it supports me.
I had dinner with June tonight. It has been AGES since I had time to just sit down and have a meal with a friend. I have been that INSANELY busy!!!! Still busy with dance choreography almost every night. But I took a break today to just appreciate and love her for her birthday. I'm so grateful she stays my friend in spite of my absenve.
And just when I was already feeling all happy I get home and find the most WONDERFUL card from my roommate shivacat. Just the other day she was getting after me for a bad habit I have around the house. I finally couldn't take it anymore and totally lashed out at her in frustration. Nothing bad came of it, because our relationship means a lot to us and we don't let things like that hurt it. So it just kind of got let go. Well she left town for 4 days and I came home and found this stunning card in which she told me how beautiful it is to see me sprout wings and grow (as I have lately) and how much she believes in us and how she knows we will work out that little problem we have and how much she loves me. And I'm standing there with the card in my hand just tearing up like a baby. I'm so blessed. Most roommates would hold a spat like that against you. Or maybe just get angry and hold it all in. Or fight about it more. But not my Shivacat. She rocks in every regard, as a friend as a roommate and as an adopted sister.
My life doesn't rock because of things or money or a boyfriend or a job. It rocks because I am becoming totally and completely myself. And in doing so, I am drawing to me and building beautiful relationships with people who are the same. And this fills my heart with more joy than I can describe.
And now for some more FUN news! June loaned me 3 videos. Okay, well actually her girlfriend did. But here they are. Do these KICK ASS or what!?!?!?!:
"The Art of Exotic Dancing" video has some great floor work I can learn! And the lap dancing I will be saving for someone special (this is is not something I intend to do for show at the clubs). And the POLE DANCING video! OH-MY-GOD check out what it says on the box:
- How to gracefully perform over 30 pole moves
- Follow-up moves for your pole techniques
- Hints for making pole work easier
Shhhhhyeeeaaa baby! I'm SO there!!! Other stuff on there too like safe warm-up and stretching techniques.
I'm off to watch the video now.