October 24th, 2006

socks and cat

haven't seen how it looks

It's very frustrating to learn a challenging and difficult new move and have no idea what you look like doing it. I showed my new one legged upside down spin to my massage therapist today when she came in for her lesson and she said it was beautiful!

I haven't had time to see if I can figure out how to reformat my digital camera to clear up the memory, so I can't take a video of it. I'm at the point where I would rather just drive up to Best Buy and purchase a new memory card. Because I want to see the move and I want to see it now! And of course I want to share it here on LJ too. :)
socks and cat

Left alone

Last week I said goodbye to quicksilver1. He was shipped off to Kuwait for at least 8 months. For a while I lived in this ignorant bliss that nothing could possibly happen to him over there because he already served a tour of duty in Iraq some years ago, and he made it home alive. But reality set in when his mother came to visit right before he left. It stands to reason that if your son is going off to war, you may never see him again. So it's a good idea to come see him for what could be one last time.

I begged him not to re-enlist when he did, I knew this was going to happen. And I can't understand WHY he would do this again. He was not the same when he came back. He saw and experienced some pretty horrible things over there. This is a place where you have to shoot to kill women and children who come at you (if they refuse to stop coming at you) because they could be carrying explosives. This is the place where you watch your friends and comrades get their guts and body parts blown all over you. He still wakes up at night screaming from the nightmares. This war may send most of our boys back alive, but they are shattered and scarred for life on the inside by what they see and experience. It seems like there's no winning situation when you are shipped off to this war. Even if you come back alive, there's a part of you that's killed over there that you can never get back.

I'm not adjusting very well to him being gone. But he made arrangements to have a friend come and live here with me until he gets back...thank god.