October 17th, 2003

socks and cat

(no subject)

Woke up this morning in pain and had to contemplate what I did last night. Mostly bending down to pick stuff up off the floor, walking around the huge room to find a place for it, stuffing it somewhere...repeat...repeat...repeat. Enough bending and stooping all night that I didn't even need to work out. Although I added sit ups, with 23 pounds of weights on my chest, before bed.

It's pathetic when a simple task like a couple hours of cleaning can hurt you. I guess I'm stubborn and I refuse to believe I actually have an injury. I mean the accident was a year ago and my car wasn't even moving when she hit me! I suppose it's a blessing that Utopia was canceled. Now I only work as a dancer one night per month instead of two. So there's less chance of aggravating the injury.

Then of course it dawns on me that I will be taking my semi-injured self to LA to climb poles and stuff. Maybe that wasn't such a brilliant plan. Now that I think about it, this plan was no so well thought out at all. I'm doing some dangerous winter driving. And the person I'll be staying with for a month actually tried to kill me once. I never pressed charges, so he got away with it. And when I ran into him 13 years later I forgave him more from pity than from the fact that I share half his DNA. Jeez, this is a another story altogether. Trust me when I say I'm not in any danger from this man. But that doesn't change the fact that I'm not real comfortable spending time with some one who tried to strangle me to death. I'm hoping after a week or so I'll find another friend willing to put me up for free for a month in their home.

I'll write another post about him this weekend if I can find time. I might as well tell the whole sordid story and explain why I trust him now.
  • Current Mood
    contemplative contemplative
socks and cat

Note to self

Dear Brain,

Please be quiet. Oh please oh please oh please. The chatter is becoming quite intolerable. I'm sorry I didn't meditate this week.

If you'll please be quiet I promise I'll have a couple drinks tonight followed by the serious possibility of some cute boy snuggle. But only if you HUSH! And I will absolutely fit in a meditation before work tomorrow night.

Remember, nothing here is real. It is all Maya. Don't waste your time chattering about and dwelling in Maya. Only in quiet can you hear the still small voice of the Divine and be guided by intuition.



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And I'm having some doubts about my trip. If anyone has any good spiritually oriented quotes about doubt, please post them.
Thanks!
  • Current Music
    Damascus - Conjure One