Girl who dances in a cage (cagekitten) wrote,
Girl who dances in a cage

I don't think there is even one area of my life that is not effected or limited in some way by my disability. But last year I thought seriously about looking into treatment and as this year comes to a close I'm starting to look at some options. The most logical one is the SPECT brain imagine scan. But I'm afraid of spending the $3,500 for it only to find that they couldn't diagnose me. I mean I don't see how tracking blood flow in the brain can also track neural activity. What if it doesn't? That's such a HUGE risk. But this weekend I spoke with some one who actually knows a gal who went through the SPECT brain scan and the treatments. I asked her to put me in touch with this person. I also spoke with some one who thinks her naturopath can at least make some improvement through a new kind of "brain food." She also told me there is not one but two centers here in Washington that treat brain injuries and can teach my brain to reroute past the parts that don't work.

I'm pretty desperate and open to anything at this point. I'm just not willing to drop thousands of dollars unless there is some strong evidence that this treatment will work for me. Tomorrow I have an appointment to talk with some one, just talk (no exams). I'm paying $175 for just an hour of his time because I think he might be able to help me sort out what might be wrong and what treatments to consider. It just doesn't make sense anymore for me to spend so much energy empowering myself and my life only to be limited in the end by an injury or disability (or whatever the hell this is). I want to be normal. I just want the same opportunities and joys in life that people who are not disabled have.

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