Girl who dances in a cage (cagekitten) wrote,
Girl who dances in a cage

Is it fair?

This would be one of those rare public posts of a personal nature (we'll see how long it stays public though). I have a sort of personal investment in the results of tonight's episode of "Project Runway." Put simply, one of the competitors has been bullying one of the other competitors: Jeffrey has been cruel to Angela. We've seen them in their workroom together as Jeffrey talks about both Angela and her mother as if Angela isn't even in the room. And much like constant bullying and talking behind some one's back does, it's started to shift the other contestant's views about her. He's spoken unkindly about other contestants as well, but he focuses his anger on her the most and he's sullied her reputation in front of millions of viewers as a result of not being able to control his own emotions.

What bothers me is that he has made it to the final show where he is competing in a major fashion show that will garner him worldwide attention and a possible successful career as a designer. I am disheartened to see that people who behave in such a way can go on to be so successful. But as much as I want to believe in the rule of three, it doesn't completely fit with my spiritual values. In fact, no form of punishment does. Because I don't believe in "evil" at all. I see the Divine as a Universal source of energy, so it doesn't hold human concepts or values. And therefor it does not judge or see anything as right or wrong. The Energy, as I understand it, knows only love or the lack thereof.

As a result of this philosophy I subscribe to, I also don't believe in judging. I don't think it's my job to interpret anything as right or wrong but instead to try and understand it so that I can benefit from that understanding or help others with it in some way. But don't misunderstand me, this does NOT mean I think those actions should be without consequences. It's possible to impose consequences on some one for the actions they have done to harm another, without judging those actions. I'm sure this might be hard for some to understand, but I think it's necessary. Otherwise we live in a world in which even more may suffer harm due to the lack of consequences to those who would hurt them.

So I guess what I'm trying to say with all this is that while I feel I should see Jeffrey's cruel treatment and humiliation of Angela as nothing more than an absence of love and a reaction to his own internal pain, I still don't think his behavior should be rewarded with the successful and prosperous career he stands to gain as a finalist. I think he should have been pulled aside and told that his behavior was unprofessional and he would not be allowed to complete the competition as a result of it. And as a victim of bullying myself, I guess I just needed to see that happen. Even the woman that has been bullying me since 2004 seems to continually suffer from one health problem after another, almost as if there really is a rule of three or some universal balance attacking her each time she attacks me. So why didn't the same happen to Jeffrey when he attacked Angela? Then I remind myself that I don't believe in judgment and there is no "right" and "wrong". But guess what? Maybe there is some kind of Universal balance. Low and behold, last minute, he was accused of cheating. The show's producers are investigating the accusation and I'll be watching on the edge of my seat tonight to see if he's thrown off the show. And even if he isn't, his reputation is ruined just by the accusation. He may never have a career and success after all the hard work he put in. And I'm wondering if that's just, since he bullied and tormented some one in the process of getting there. I guess my philosophical and spiritual beliefs are a bit at odds with my desire to see the world be a fair place.

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