Girl who dances in a cage (cagekitten) wrote,
Girl who dances in a cage

another mushy thank you

I gave a private lesson tonight and now my heart is singing. I am quickly discovering that I love private lessons so very much more than classes. I'm discovering that teaching is actually a loving thing. These women expose their weaknesses and fears to me and allow me to come in and build them back up, encourage them, and give them a strength and sexiness and confidence that makes them glow. But that love is diluted when I have to share it with 6 girls equally. There are students who are weak in points or certain moves and I can't take the time I want to really work with them because five other girls are ready to move on to the next more advanced move. I do my best to give them individual attention, but there's only so much you can do in a structured lesson plan.

With individual sessions, I'm able to be totally and completely devoted to her every need for the complete hour. Every strength she has I can build on. Every weakness she has I can slowly and gently guide her through it no matter how long it takes. It is a complete and whole experience that I can't do justice to with just words. It is an exchange of energy that feels very much like love you have for anyone in your life you want to watch grow and blossom.

To top all this off, tonight's student kept asking questions because she wanted to know all about me and my pole dancing. And you know me, if you get me started on that topic, I can't stop. And she wanted to hear it ALL! So I got to share my story and talk on and on and on about the topic I never get tired of talking about. And she appreciated every minute of it and kept asking for more! I was enjoying the lesson so much that I didn't want it to end. I was just going to go past the hour and not even charge her for the extra time!

When she left, I stared at the $50 cash in my hand and felt like I was going to cry from the joy of it. Years of slaving away at something I don't even like, and for what? Maybe $10 an hour. Maybe $12 an hour? The most I could make at these jobs was $14 or $15, but not for long since I always lost those jobs when they found out I'm disabled. And here I am in the present moment holding $50 for an hour of what was such pure bliss and pure love that I didn't want it to end. And she'll be back every week for more. How could I not cry? How could I not feel completely overwhelmed with emotion and gratitude at having been guided to such a beautiful place in my life. In case I haven't mentioned this lately, thank you to every one of you that has helped me get here. To all of you who have done this for me, you know who you are: Thank you for the advice you give in your comments and in person. Thank you for sharing your experiences with me as business owners and teachers. Thank you for the editing and proof reading of my website and newsletters. Thank you for the web hosting and web lessons. Thank you for the web design. Thank you for the interior design services. Thank you for the legal advice and proofing of my contracts. Thank you for telling me how to do things that have to be done for a business and telling me where to go to find the things I needed for the business. And for anything you did for me that I forgot to mention here. You all have helped me build this little thing that has given me the ability to create and sustain something that loves me and feeds me and provides me with a way to express myself creatively and care for and love more people than I ever thought I would love in a lifetime...and be paid abundantly for it. YOU!

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