Girl who dances in a cage (cagekitten) wrote,
Girl who dances in a cage
cagekitten

Here's how the disability works

Knowing how much I'm into performance art, folks keep suggesting I see Cirque De Soleil.  Stop already.  Part of my disability is not being able to remember things.   I've seen Cirque, at least once.  Possibly twice.  I have no memory of the show at all.  I very much wanted to see Dead Can Dance when they were in Seattle.  But what's the point of paying $100 to see a show you will have no memory of within a few weeks?  Same goes for concerts like Depeche Mode.  Same goes for pretty much everything.  

Basically if I go to a show or performance of any kind, I get to enjoy it while I see it.  But I'm only able to retain memories attached to emotional experiences.  So unless the show causes me some pain or some blissed out joy, it will be virtually erased from my memory within weeks.  I don't remember most places I've been, most parties I've been to, I don't even have any memory of just about every date I've ever been on.  If some one reminds me that I went, like: "Hey remember when we went to Cirque De Soleil together?" or "Hey remember that time we went to that party?" that will jar the memory of the fact that we went.  It will not bring back the memory of the actual event.

Welcome to being disabled.  I do not get to enjoy the things in life you folks do.  I very desperately want to see Cirque De Soleil and go to concerts and enjoy fairs and events.  But what's the point of paying $40 to $70 for a show I will have absolutely no memory of within a few weeks? 

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